Thursday, October 12, 2006
Descriptions Will Be Vague to Protect the Guilty
Today, I had to contact somebody I really did not want to contact. I was going along blithely in my day-to-day, then an incident occurred a few days ago that made it necessary to get in touch with this person. This morning, it all seemed a lot easier and I think I managed to keep communication to a minimum, but last night I was in the throes of anxiety. I can't imagine he would want to be in contact with me, either. He knows I know what he is. Eventually, our paths would have crossed again (this town is too small), and really, like I said, this morning it was no big deal. However, I also know that there will probably be a time where our interaction will not be limited to an email. If I felt this ill over having to do such a small thing, how am I going to feel in more 'involved' situations? I know he wouldn't ever physically hurt me, but there are some very disturbing aspects to him. It's not fear of him, but a hatred of what's inside him. I've never had such a powerful, involuntary hatred before. It is so unlike me to let the mere thought of somebody shake me up. I am a light and loving person, damn it!